Friends, Family & Carers Forum

[Marie55]

Never give up! My daughter was diagnosed the same but now works and takes care of her daughter. She was in a mental institution for months but God can fix. But you have to be patient, believe and stay in the Word of God.

[Appleblossom]

Hello @Dadcaringalone It is a hard trek and I can identify with many aspects of your story.  Being a parent, being the stable sib, til I broke. etc ...

Love your vego-versary!

Outward bound or similar can be great.

I used to lead family on treks all over, til wore my joints out. 

Know what you mean @greenpea

Feeling sorry for self this morning in the hip area .. but really nothing to complain about .. over all.

Take Care People.

[Dadcaringalone]

@greenpea

@Appleblossom

@Marie55

Greenpea Sorry I didn’t not respond to yours in detail for a while as I’ve been totally overwhelmed over the past few weeks. Didn’t want it to seem like I forgotten sane or you or anyone else trying their best to keep truck’n.

I’ve been in both my son’s and daughter’s realities and have only really come back down to to my own reality! The trip didn’t go as planned because of strong seas stopping the fishing trip and also a few panic attacks along the way which meant we had to cut plans short and renegotiate certain arrangements. All is better now.

Glad your daughter has a better psychiatrist now. My daughter is also happy with hers and appears to be coping very well at present and has managed to normalize herself in terms of her friendship network. She’s living separately from my son and us at the moment and that seems to be working well because she’s not receiving the negative influence from his condition. It’s a pity there is no way to insulate someone from such influences. Appleblossom, hope I can meet her again for either of our vego-versaries as she’s interstate and I miss her dearly.

We managed to get my son through a big week last week but he still hasn’t been able to reingage with friends or establish new ones. This is a major challenge for him and us and I hope things improve with uni restarting and him trying to get back to work. I tried to introduce the idea of a group of people who also hear voices but he is not ready for that at present. Not sure you have heard of Rufus May and the groups he has setup?

I’m also trying to get back into work. I have tried to have a day of rest per week but a few times he has had a panic attack or negative thoughts making him depressed breaking up my “me” time which is a pity. I still find myself doing a lot for him and the longevity and invasiveness of the his condition still becomes totally overwhelming for me if I think too much about it. Just putting all my efforts into trying to make him autonomous like my daughter. Marie55, thanks for your reassurance this is in fact possible! It’s a pity I can’t reply more on extended family or friends to help out but it a big ask and there are still a lot of social stigma around mental health and schizophrenia is incorrectly thought of as a multiple personalities disorder.

This is just a quick catch up as I have a busy day now of doctors and therapist appointments for my son. Best of luck to you and everyone else and I send positive vibrations of wellness for all to see the beauty in the challenging and beautiful lives we all lead.

[Appleblossom]

Friendships can be tricky.  We can suggest and enable, but it is a subtle dance of personalities that makes a friendship work. Not being able to connect can be more harmful to self confidence than remaining solo.

Sometimes similar interest groups help, but only when he is ready.

 @Dadcaringalone Taking Care

[greenpea]

@Dadcaringalone  Hi Dadcaringalone I have not  heard of Rufus May and the groups he has setup? Am just having a look online now. Is that something that  you have in mind for your son? From what I have briefly read it does sound interesting. I will have to investigate further. It would not suit my son2 he has too many issues to cope with but for me there could be a window of hope ....

Wishing your son luck with getting back into uni and reengaging with his friends (which I know is so important) particularly for a young person. It is so hard  .... am really happy for you that your daughter is doing well with both her medical and personal side of her life. That is one less thing for you to worry about.

Hope the remainder of your day is calm and 'pea'ceful 😄 xxxxxx

[Marie55]

I know this may sound deep but I purchased communion cups and began to do it several times per week with my daughter and her daughter and asked God to break every curse off her and family. I took her to church every Sunday and God is working out one of the most horrific times of my life. That disease is a demonic attack and needs to be treated as such! I no longer say she has any disease but I tell her I love her Alot and that she is a child of the most high God who has great plans for life! She now works in the medical field helping others. I know I sound deep just never give up and give hugs and tell how much you love him everyday and Believe that God can fix anything!

[Dadcaringalone]

@greenpea Thanks for yours.

Been pea'ceful all day until he went to see his Psychologist at uni and I was balancing my words on eggshells all the way home until he told me because of his migraine and what was discussed in his session he would prefer to not talk. I had a few lollies in the car and he almost emptied the entire pack to make himself feel better. Made him something to eat to feel better when we got home. He’s now playing video games on his Switch to calm down.

I was particularly impressed with Rufus May’s Youtube video on mindfulness. There is also another one of his BBC program on the Doctor who hears voices. Mindfulness really works from my past experience, I have found it can transform your life. Doing a Conference paper on it soon at an international Conference overseas. This keeps me on the straight and narrow and balanced enough to navigate all this volatility. 

Trust you are keeping things pea'ceful and looking after yourself because you need to be strong to cope.

Take care and laugh when you need a break 

[Dadcaringalone]

@Appleblossom

Couldn't agree more Appleblossom.

I hope that with him slowly going back to work and uni there will be opportunities for him to make some new friends who are more sympathetic to his mental health challenges so he is not even more ostracized than he currently feels.  It’s devastating for a parent to see their son’s confidence being destroyed when he has some much happiness and beauty to share with the world. I noticed the first few signs of spring arriving in our street with a few trees of blossom sharing their beauty with us in Sunny Sydney. Hope you are starting to see some appleblossoming?

[Acacia]

Hi @Marie55

Welcome to the Forums. It's great to hear that your daughter is doing well and has a job that she enjoys. I'd just like to remind you to be mindful that we all have our own understandings and explanatory models of mental health and mental illness; and similarly, find different strategies and supports helpful. Please take care to respect others' experiences and understandings while posting in the forums.

All the best

Acacia

[greenpea]

@Dadcaringalone Hey Dadcaringalone funny you should mention both the Mindfullness and the BBC movie as I have a Mindfullness course starting in just over a week and I watched the BBC movie after you gave us the heads up today. It is very interesting. I hate taking my meds basically for what they do to me and would to try an alternative route on my journey with this....

As I say medication is the only way to deal with my son's problems as they are too entrenched in his mind plus he has so many other issues going on but even if I could gain some control over my voices that would be a wonderful step forward for the family. I will definately look at the mindfullness  Youtube video but probably after I go to my course and then weight up the two. Will be interesting.

Sorry your son wasn't in a good place after his psychologist appointment. My son doesn't like them either .... they always put him in a bad mood for some reason or another. 

Good luck with your conference. It sounds very daunting but I am sure you will fine 🙂 . As you say it is a great distraction from what is happening at home. Please let us all know how you go with it. We will all be thinking of you and wishing you luck 🙂

I will remember those words 'Laugh when you need a break'