Advice on what to do about my love life

[Kalista_starr]

Basically, I met this guy and we instantly clicked. We shared so much in common and he was so easy and fun to talk to, not like anyone else I have ever met. After a couple weeks of talking he asked me out and so we started dating but he quickly lost interest and went to his ex. After a while we started talking again and we talked it out and got back together. We were together for around 6-7 months when he started to get dry and always overthinking. I am so loyal to the point where I brush things of so the relationship lasts. And then one day he broke up with me, blaming me for liking his friend (when I didn’t), and though-out the relationship he was a little worrying sometimes and we didn’t speak for weeks until one day a couple weeks ago we started talking, just as friends this time. He has a girlfriend, and I would never do anything to break them up. But this whole time I still have loved him. This past week we have gotten really close, expressing how we miss each other, and how he loves me so much and left me because he was too scared to get attached. And lately we have been saying I love you, as friends but we know deep down it’s more than that. But he told me he is going to get back to me and break up with his girlfriend, but I don’t know if I should wait and go back to him. I don’t know because he worries me sometimes by going dry for a bit, and why should I wait for someone to love me when they are with another they love. I am not sure if this makes sense, there is so much more to this but I’m trying to keep it short. Advice on what to do about my love life

[Sparky79]

Hi @Kalista_starr welcome to the forums.

It's an amazing feeling when you feel as though you've met your soul mate, the side effect of that is you make excuses for their behaviour. Would the saying "fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice shame on me" be appropriate here?. So he's said he will leave his current girlfriend for you? bearing in mind that twice you were that girlfriend that he left for someone else, so you know exactly how that feels, and what his girlfriend will be going through. What's to stop him leaving you for another again? I mean he's already done it twice. Bless your heart and nature for giving him a second chance already, and it's bad that he's taken advantage of you and your nature and is trying for a third time.

Please don't let his actions ruin these feelings when you meet who you are truly meant for. Don't give him the chance to leave you for another again, you've been more than generous giving him a second chance already.

Instead allow the right person to come into your life, by being you, doing what you like to do, living the life you want to live. Your true partner will come into your life all by himself.

Don't be afraid to reach out, many have experienced what you are going through and are happy to help.

[Kalista_starr]

Thank you a lot for this, it makes total sense of the situation

[Sparky79]

@Kalista_starr You're more than welcome.

[AnonymooseOG]

Hello!

This is going to be really brief because I don't have much left in the tank tonight, but pleeeeease don't get back with this guy!

If he's telling you he loves you behind his current girlfriend's back, he will tell someone else he loves her and wants to break up with you once you become his girlfriend. If he'll do it WITH you, he'll do it TO you. Whether you want to hear this or not, he is having an emotional affair with you. Don't feel too bad, though. He's the one who is cheating, not you!

You will get over him. I kicked an ex to the curb years ago and thought I'd never feel love for anyone else... which I was totally wrong about. It took a while, but I'm currently in love with someone whom I accidentally ticked off during a breakdown (long story). It may not be a happy ending, but at least it's possible to feel love after love!

[Kalista_starr]

Thank you so much 🫶🏻