31-01-2018 10:01 PM
Is Dementia Mental Illness? It's a disease of the mind so i'm hoping i still belong here. If not for that - today at the DR he was asked if he gets depression - dad answered "yes I do get depressed" It's hard to read with dad's early vascular dementia.
Around Christmas i moved in with my parents as mum was unable to manage hersef let alone continue as dad's carer. She was end stage cancer and died in hospital palliative care only 19 days after i arrived I was shocked how sick she became in the 2months since my last three week trip.. My goodness - what a fighter she was. My two younger brothers were dropping in a couple of times a day & helped with transport, bills & shopping - but could not stay in the house.longer than 30min - becoming restless... (probably the MI-Sz / drug related) and they were wearing thin. getting angry.. Mum was so difficult / hurtful during my last stay to help, i was reluctant to come again unless she asked me to. It was hard for her but necessary. The first attempt to drive the 1200km i ran off the road & badly crashed my car - a 'Write Off' Sore bones & shellshot - I had to rest a few days before flew down.
I hit the floor running - household duties, neals & loads of patient reassurance for mum. Even giving her a bell. Wasnt easy looking them both, clearly dad had been neglected for sone time.
I was still in the bad books for reporting him as a medically 'unfit' driver during my last stay. They fought it and gad x2 doctors confer ( why not done before is beyond me).
So here i am, feeling alone with 'toxic family' threatened by my presence, the loss of my mum, a dad in grief, with early vascular dementia, diabetes, heart disease, spinal injury - poor mobility, bad incontinence. Its full on some days. Not just the cleaning up but all the medical appointments. Especially since mum had understandablly got behind on things like optometrist, pidiatrist... even the GP...
Just looking for support as feeling somewhat shattered after only x5 weeks. Big day today.
01-02-2018 09:48 AM
@Former-Member, that is a lot... you definitely belong here...
How are you feeling today? It seems like you have a long road ahead.
Trust you are able to find the strength to get through each day.
01-02-2018 05:54 PM
sending you lotsof tender hugs @Former-Member
There are a few different kinds of Dementia
01-02-2018 08:35 PM
Hey @Former-Member, it sounds like the past few months have been very difficult for you. Firstly, I'm sorry to hear of your mum's passing only 19 days after you arrived at your parents' house. It must of been very difficult to watch her health deteroriate in such a short amount of time. Having been in a car accident prior to going to help your parents must have also been a shock and I'm sure taken a toll on you - physically and mentally. It sounds like you helped your parents in so many ways despite this - that takes a lot of strength.
I can understand why some days would be full on. Do you find any time to check in and take care of yourself amidst all that you do for the others around you?
Sending support your way...
01-02-2018 09:03 PM
05-02-2018 05:52 AM
06-02-2018 11:04 PM
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