Lived Experience Forum

[Cocoloco]

I was drugged by my ex. It was mdma. I thought I was going hysterical. 

he would often abuse me and sexually abuse me. 

he hurt me bad before he suicided. He drugged me a few times to my knowledge . 

I know now he used a lot of drugs.😔I don't think the mdma did me any good. He was such an asshole to do that. 

I never feel safe now. I am edgy. My heart rate often goes over 150. I am scared to live. Scared of people. 

I love life. I don't like feeling so awful. Can't process it all, believe it's happened to me and that I had to tolerate it. He was dangerous. He said he wanted to leave but when I cut off he would threaten suicide. 

he isn't here but I am still scared. I have been abused several times by different people. I have ptsd. It's hard to be here a lot of the time

i need time to process and heal but life is so busy. I am trying to find support and ideas but I am hopeless at communicating due to being autistic. 

I was told to make noise to get help😔 I don't think so. I had a good OT session today and donuts do it was a bit happy! 

Gratitude is good. I hope everyone is okay. 

[outlander]

hi @Cocoloco 

im sorry youve been through so much in your lifetime already. 

do you have any professional supports to help you along and start to recover and help you to feel safe once again?

[Cocoloco]

Hi. At the moment not what I need. The help I have is useful. I am just quite tired and needed help with some practical things. 

[Millieme]

I like to have a plan of what to do in different situations that are scary to me. I need to know what Is going to happen each day and sort of have a reliable routine to things that I can depend on to feel safe. Life gets in the way of that a lot. Try to find ways to control what I can and use all the breathing abs grounding I can for sourcing too. Is sometimes a hard way to live.