why can't I cope longer?

[Zoe7]

It is good you got your mind off things even if it was for a little while @Former-Member - any relief from our thoughts is a good thing. I hear you about not knowing what to expect when you call a helpline but they are only people on the other side of the phone and often what we need and what we get are opposing forces - and sometimes it is more unhelpful than helpful. That doesn't mean you can't keep contacting them if need be and there is always SANE helpline in the hours they are available. ...and of course you can post here to get things off your chest as well. I find often that just getting things off my chest can help a little but having that validation of what we are feeling is super important too. There are those of us here that are sitting with you Hon and very much hearing how hard it all is for you right now 

[outlander]

@Former-Member 💛💚💜💙❤

[Former-Member]

Hi @outlander
Love all those pretty coloured hearts 🌈.
Thank you. 😁
How's your week so far?

[outlander]

Hi @Former-Member
My weeks been really busy but todays abit quiter till thi arvo. Just catching up on housework today.
How are you? Do you have much on today?

🧡💛💚💙💜🖤💟❣💌💝

[Former-Member]

I have a headache, and my Blood Pressure high, 156/94 & my chest is heavy. Gonna have to do anaurgent fasting detox or something. Dr wants to put me on a 4th med for my blood pressure but getting me to check it twice a day for a fortnight first. She scared me with predictions of 'stroke' and heart attack... And pressured me to exercise and diet and lose weight and... Its all so exhausting I just want to die already lol.. Actually snapped at her last week and said "if you can guarantee me a a quick painless death with a heart attack then I don't give a shit about all this stuff" It sort of came out of nowhere actually, not sure the young GP knew how to take it. Can't get into more senior GPs as new to town and they're not taking any new patients atm" (more BPD abandonment triggers), so trying to be patient. Really feeling past my useby date trying to balance several boarderline health issues.
Meanwhile, today at home, I just had a double bed & mattress delivered by Salvos and they'd broke the bedhead 😞 so I'm gonna have to get brackets or something. I asked them if they had time to please help me get the wardrobe out of my car (been there 2wks now), but they said no (which for some reason is making me cry, boo hoo 😢). I really shouldn't do it myself with the back and blood pressure issues and not sure what to do. Makes me sad.

[outlander]

Hugs @Former-Member thats really tough. I recently found out i have high bp too where my normal is around 148/95 so have to keep an eye on mine as well to make sure it doesnt get any higher.

Im sorry salvos broke your bed and gave you a blunt no. Surely they couldve taken 10 min out of their time.

Your definently not past your uae by date lovely. I have also been in those dark pits that seems endless but keep fighting for those good days and when you cant fight ill lend you one of my floaties so you can rest ❤❤❤

[Former-Member]

Wish I didn't have so many problems

[Former-Member]

Yes please @outlander , I need a floatie today.. Let's find a picture for that lol

[Former-Member]

Hi @Former-Member 

I am so sorry to hear how much you have been struggling with your mental and physical health lately - in particular, your suicide ideation and blood pressure.

I just wanted to let you know that I have sent you a check-in email.

Please reach out if you need any support.

Kindest Regards,

Amour_Et_Psyché

[outlander]

What about one of these owl ones? @Former-Member